💧 HUMAN.EXE NEEDS WATER Hoodie • Hydration Quest Gamer Hoodie • Cozy Retro Gamer Sweatshirt • Funny 80s 90s Gaming Gift

HYDRATION QUEST, BUT MAKE IT COZY

Same tongue-in-cheek design as the tee—upgraded to a warm gamer hoodie for late-night sessions, cold offices, and “don’t talk to me until I’ve had water (and maybe coffee)” days.

Front design

Large neon text: HUMAN.EXE NEEDS WATER

Pixel glass of water with cute water drop sitting on the rim

Small tagline: HYDRATION QUEST — NOT OPTIONAL


Back design

System readout: HYDRATION STATUS — REAL LIFE DLC

Playful hydration stats:

WATER TODAY................ 01 GLASS

COFFEE COUNT............... 03 CUPS

HEADACHE CHANCE............ +25%

FOCUS BONUS................ LOCKED

Quest steps:

☑ REFILL BOTTLE

☑ TAKE 10 STEPS

☑ SIP BETWEEN MATCHES


Tiny footer line: “PRO TIP: YOU CAN’T PATCH DEHYDRATION WITH MORE COFFEE.”

Looks like a game HUD, reads like your day.


Why this hoodie hits different (Gildan 18500)

8.0 oz medium-heavy blend — cozy, warm, perfect for chilly days and late-night gaming

50/50 cotton-poly — soft feel with real-world durability

Double-lined hood + matching drawcord for extra warmth and a clean look

Kangaroo pocket for phones, snacks, or that emotional-support water bottle

Tear-away label — zero neck irritation

Ethically made with OEKO-TEX® certified dyes, so it’s kinder to your skin and the planet

Perfect for:
Hydration-challenged gamers, introverts on a wellness arc, gifts for 80s/90s players who love retro pixel art, and anyone whose real-life HUD currently says “needs water, again.”